Monday, January 10, 2011

Dear Mrs.

I am taking a brief blog moment, to inform you,
I no longer like you.
I no longer desire to be your friend.

If there was a 'Dislike' button on your blog, I would click it 3 separate times in a day. Maybe 4. Possibly 5.

I shall never vacation with you again.
That is... if we were ever invited back.
Holla Back Sweetbreads and Warhol!

I still find your children adorable, yet Tink will no longer be allowed to play with your girls, as I would feel guilty if Punkin and Shortcake repeated back the swear words I had maliciously spewed about their mother.

Your smile is like bug repellent.
Your laughter is repugnant.

In closing.
I do not care for you. I feel contempt for your presence in my family. I loathe the very idea of you. You are an abomination on my existence.

Tru Stories.

In related news....
Yesterday, I registered for the 5:00pm Heat,
of the Warrior Race.


The Mrs. said...

1. You have a real way with words. A smile like bug repellent? A repugnant laughter? That's funny stuff right there.

2. If you stop to think about this for a brief moment, you actually have no one to blame but yourself. I was happily living my sedentary lifestyle until about a year ago when you shattered my lazy world with the idea of running a 5 mile race.

3. The fact that you have entered the Warrior Dash has turned an otherwise tedious and somewhat frustrating day into one filled with rainbows and smiles.

4. I now know just how far you will go for blog material. AND I HEART THAT FOR REALZ.

Anonymous said...

Holla for soms waks n baks

Tru Stories said...

It really has to be for Blog Material. Or extreme weakness under peer pressure. Because even now, with the Dash more than 6 months away... I feel like vomiting. Honestly.

Munchkin said...

all i wanted to see when i clicked on comments was two

sweetbreads says:

warhol says

that would've been hilarious, way to drop the ball guys

Flag Girl said...

I'm with two suck

Sweetbreads Bailey said...

Fine. Holla. I almost did yesterday, but then realized that I was 'hollering' to the fact that I am a trainwreck. :)

Anonymous said...

I Holla that!

Tru Stories said...

We REALLY love to hang out with Trainwrecks... just ask Munchkin.
They keep us happy.

Munchkin said...

there's no such thing as bad press bitches

Bird said...

I was going to sign up for the dash myself. Apparently, life had other plans for me and I will have to wait it out. Good luck! Let me know how it goes.