Friday, August 31, 2012

And Without ANY Further Adieu...

I VERY happily bring to the world, the writings of an Honored Guest Blogger (my 'broder') Warhol:
I'll Have the Sweetbreads, please..
My Erin-
You came into my life, out of no where (a garage, in fact.) A very "odd place for such a classy lookin girl."... With your quiet wit, you quickly lazered in my full attention.  I asked you on a date and you said YES!!... and then No... then YES!! again. After spending only a little time with you, I learned several important things:
You carry yourself with class
but are willing to down a Busch Light with the boys.
You prefer the finer restaurants
but loves Katsup on your Mac n Cheese.
Your eyes glaze over, when I recite the entire (Classic) "Hey Mikey" Life cereal commercial but you can name all of Brad and Angelina's children.
You are smart, funny, caring
and Beautiful.
All of this and more, is why I fell in love with you.
Now. It is time... to look towards Our Future.

"I said, I think that we can stay here,
Cause I feel our time has come.
And we can walk down to the ocean,
And sit with the rising sun.
So unpack your bags this instant,
No more running from town to town
And now that we've arrived so safely,
Baby you can..."

So... Erin Michelle Wrigley....
____ ___ _____ __ ????

Thursday, August 30, 2012

The Truman Show

The Kid and I were driving alone together in the van.
I noticed him looking out the window...
He paused and then said: Don't make fun of me... but have you ever thought it's weird that we aren't people in a book?  Or characters in a movie? Isn't it weird that we are 'real'? And not like a movie, someone is watching?

I looked directly at him and answered: I used to think that very same thing all the time.

The Kid turned and responded nervously with MUCH skepticism: Seriously?  Are you being serious??

Me: I'm totally serious.  I clearly remember thinking it was weird that I was 'real'. I always wondered if maybe we were little people in a dollhouse or something and bigger people were watching our lives.

With a grateful smile and sigh of relief, The Kid settled back into his seat.


As a parent, often we are so tired and overwhelmed... that we sometimes forget the amazing ideas bouncing around inside their heads... and that long ago... they used to bounce around inside of ours.

Later, I told Coach the story.
He got excited: I can totally remember thinking that!  I can remembering thinking it was sorta like the movie 'The Truman Show' and that maybe lots of people were watching me, for fun... and then I always thought... if people were watching me, right THAT minute, maybe I should do something cooler, to keep them entertained.

Weirdly, Coach has never really lost that thought process ... it sorta followed him through life.  Maybe that's why Coach is so likable.  Because he just wants to keep the phantom crowd entertained.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

We're like a Page Torn from the Most Poetic Love Story...

A totally random conversation between Coach and I.... completely out of the blue:

Me: You know my Uncle Jerry..?  Did you know his middle name is Harry?

Coach: Seriously?!

Me: Yep... Jerry Harry Wahl.  Isn't that funny?

Coach: That's hilarious.

Me: I know....right?

Coach: What's George Washington's middle name?

Me: I have no idea.  Why??

Coach: Because if his middle name started with an H, your uncle would have the same initials as George Washington.

Me: Ummmmm...

Coach: GHW... they would be the same... ohhh.. Wait a minute... Jerry starts with..

Me: You know... maybe you shouldn't always vocalize your thought process... MAYBE sometimes, you should pause for a moment and just THINK your thought thru before actually saying it out loud...

Monday, August 27, 2012

Happy Birthday Cousin

To My cousin, The Kid's God-mother, my sister in law and my childrens' aunt...
An excellent mother to three beautiful girls...
(one is a sniff sniff big Kindergarten girl!)
A still infatuated wife to her high school sweetheart...
A caring and devoted daughter and a successful business owner with healing hands...
I hope you have enjoyed your day, filled with lots of little girls smiles and tiny sweet hugs.  Take care... here's wishing for many more years of your already full and blessed life.
Happy Birthday, Jackie.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Probably.... this is How Britney Spears started...

Coco CRAVES the spotlight.  She can not get enough applause.  'All eyes on me in the middle of ring, just like a circus...' Thursday night she begged (demanded) a shot at the microphone.  She actually told The Teacher, 'I'm rweady to sing, when you need me...'
Then Friday night, she was easily more entertaining than the actual Half Time Show... (Please listen for her super HIlarious Aunt Flag Girl's comment.)

Raise your hand, if you're nervous to parent this child.

Friday, August 24, 2012

All Day Kindergarten is Really All Day Long.

Very calmly but also a little hopeful, like she had just stumbled across an amazing idea, Tink says: "You know... sometimes.... kids don't always hafta go to school EVERY day... sometimes, some kids, can stay home on some days... did you ever know that??"

SEE!  She does miss me!!  Or... maybe she misses her couch, her TV and her jammies..  Either way, she almost convinced me.

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Fresh Start

This morning, The Kid was off to start his first day at Private School.  We're all a little nervous but also very excited for the potential of his school year.

After MONTHS of late night discussions, Coach and I decided, The Kid simply deserved something new.  Obviously, we are happy with Our Town's public school (we currently have 2 little ladies enrolled). Coach is an employee of our schools, many nieces and nephews are attendees.  We have never been unhappy with our teachers or his opportunities.  The Kid did amazingly there and I have no concerns for our girls' futures. Our decision was not based on any one person or thing. See.... the problem is this: 
Nearly eleven years ago, I had this baby boy.  I held him in my arms, in a room completely alone with this incredible life I had just created.... and with new mommy whispers, I promised him the world.  The whole world.  And... I sorta meant it.
During these nearly eleven years, I have had to make many tough decisions, to keep my promise.  Decisions I knew, may be unpopular but being a parent is a mostly thankless and unpopular job inherently. Two weeks ago, we finally decided to 'Just Go For It' and enrolled The Kid in a nearby Catholic School.  Resulting in us becoming the Most Unpopular Parents of All Times in the History of Annoying Parents.
Why did we enroll The Kid in a new school??
The Full Explanation? Simply... because I promised my son the world. End of Story. I will try anything, to make those brown eyes sparkle with a genuine smile.

Now... I also have dreams.  I have wanted my entire life, to travel Europe.  And a few months ago, I realized my sweet husband had started a Europe Envelope, where he was stashing cash away for my dream trip to Europe. Isn't Coach lovely??
10 days ago, I took that envelope labeled "Europe $" and used the contents to pay The Kid's tuition at the new school. The Kid spied what I was doing and had a meltdown as we walked from the school...

The Kid: "I can't believe you just used all that money!!  Now I feel even more stupid that you just used all your Europe money!!"

Me: "Why would you feel stupid?"

The Kid: "Because Europe is your dream and now I feel guilty because you just spent all your money on me.  Now you will hate me because you can't go to Europe!"

I smiled and nearly laughed at his naivety: "Kid... you must not be as smart as everyone thinks. Don't you realize by now??.. YOU are my dream. You and your sisters are my best dreams.  I would do anything to make your lives better.... Europe can wait."

Dear Kid:
I am willing to start our lives, our path, our dreams over from scratch repeatedly... for my love of you.  You deserve everything we can give you and more.  I feel great about our decision and I believe you will flourish in your new environment.  Dad and I will take every "I hate you..." you can dish... because we will always love you.  You deserve the Moon, the Stars and more.  Good luck in your new adventure. 
My First tru love: We believe in you... your brilliance, your sensitivity and your amazing heart. 
Happy First Day of School. 
And. Today.  Officially.
I am a stay at home mother... to no kids.  Ouch.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

The First Day of the Rest of My (ummm... Their) Life

It happened, yesterday my middle, teeny baby began all day Kindergarten.  And it Was Not Pretty.  Well... Tink was pretty AND calm, excited and collected. But her mother?? Totally the opposite."Used to be a Hooker" witnessed my unusual and NEVER seen display of emotion and threatened to snap a picture for Internet Publishing... but I shot her a look which translated something like "Don't you bleepin dare photograph the saddest Mommy day of my life or I will bring the wrath down on you and your family."

Tink woke excited. Dressed in her adorable First Day Outfit. Accessorized with her lucky Tinkerbell necklace, entered her class room, hung her bag and darted directly over to the play section.  Done with me.

Her Mother??
Wandered around behind her.  Confused, sad and desperately trying to figure out how to stop time. 
My throat was tight, my eyes were blurred.  My mind raced with 'What ifs...'
What if she can't unbutton her new pants for the potty and has an accident and is nicknamed PeePee Girl, for the rest of her life??
What if she can't open her sandwich box?
What if she misses me?
What if I miss her so much it hurts? What if she never hugs me again, continues to age in warp speed and gets married?? I dashed out the side door and Totally Lost My Cool.  I was instantly mad at Coach.  I'm sure this is his fault.  He MADE them grow up. 

Because I wasn't broken enough, I had to crawl myself out of my funk (warm fuzzy blankets) to take my baby baby to everyday PreK at Noon.  Weird... I barely mentioned the drama of my actual baby going to school... but the honest truth is: Coco is a 8 year old girl trapped in a 3 yr old body.  She's been ready to ditch me for YEARS.  It's almost a relief to finally let her go to school.

Within a fraction of a second of the truck slowing to a stop, Coco sing-songed "Danks Mom and Dad!!" And suddenly learned to undo her seat belt and tried to open own door, flinging her body from the vehicle..  Like a 14 yr old embarrassed someone may notice her parents dropping her at school.
We made her slooooow down a minute and take a few pictures with friends.  Her and St. Patrick..

This next picture was too great NOT to post: Little First Day of School adjustment, I suppose.

Below: Coco and her cousin M.

After dropping Coco at school, I really hated Coach.  I mean, now... for the rest of my life... I just HAVE to spend Mondays with Coach?? And then... in like 5 years all our kids will start college and then I will spend EVERY day of my life, just with Coach??
How unfair is that?!

Sweetly Coach said: "What can I do for you?? Can I get you something?"

I sighed and grumpily said: "Yes. Get me a baby."

Coach replied: "Uhhhh, I don't think... I can..."

Me: "It doesn't HAVE to be a NEW baby, I'll just take one of my old babies back."

Coach: "Not sure... but I don't think it works like that."

By the end of the school day, I was hardly any better. My girls skipped out, maybe a little tired but still happy.  Smiley Tink and her Best Friend Cousin Twin Forever (Owl) after their first day together.
(I had to snap the pic AFTER school because I was too hysterical BEFORE to school to hang around and catch Owl's first morning.)

Morning Two?
Better... except for my new fears that A.) I am unable to appropriately dress my child to remain warm in the morning and then cool in the afternoon... and B.) she will be unable to open her lunchable or C.) she will suddenly forget where her classroom is located and be lost wandering the halls with her tiny legs, lost forever.
So.. I'm getting better-ish.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Monday morning....

my tiny Tinkerbell of a daughter will start all day Kindergarten and It is BreaKing me... as you continue to read the following post, you'll assume Tink is my favorite.  No child is my 'favorite' they are each mine for many different reasons.  But my Tinkerbell... she's my girl, my soul mate, my teeny button of a companion.  So little, I imagined I could curl her up and hold her in my pocket forever.
Except, apparently... I can not.
Once Tink entered the world, she was perfectly content to pass her days snuggled safely in the arms of her people.  She was first nicknamed our glow worm, swaddled tightly in her pink 'bankies' so small, it was if I had purchased her from the toy aisle.

She was a quiet crier.  Quiet sleeper.  A quiet soft face, with quietly captivating blue eyes, I've described as the color of an approaching summer storm.

While her younger cousin Owl, crawled then walked then climbed everything first... Tink spoke first.  Again.. quietly.  Except immediately it was obvious Tink was funny.  Amusing.  Spunky.  She was tiny... but she fought for her attention.

And then, she became our Tinkerbell.
Our teeny, blond haired, blue eyed Fairy. 
With a quick wit and feisty temper.

Tink began to engage her crowds.
Not with flash (like her sista) but with a hook.  Pulling you in and encouraging you to beg for her attention.  Tink wanted her adults to earn her devotion, really buy a ticket to her show.

And once you had purchased that ticket, you may have noticed her self designed path is paved with her off colored stones. Tink has flair. Outfits with color, hats, mismatched choices, crazy curls and Wings... Any outfit, any costume, any holiday is made significantly more interesting with a pair of wings.

I am nervous for my Tink, in an organized school setting.  She infamously ignores and dismisses all rules.  While Tink rarely gets in trouble or crosses any real lines... she always prefers to follow her schedule, her inclination or her drummer before any other.

Tink chooses whom she wishes to speak too.
Tink chooses to dress, when and if she deems the day worthy of ditching her jammies.  She will choose her version of a healthy diet, she will friend when ready and above all... Tink will let you know the exact moment her teeny legs feel ready to start her day and leave her couch.  And not one minute sooner.

Tink is a walking expression.
Her attentive crowd is only a shoulder shrug, bumped hip or eye roll from losing her approval.  She will not, under any circumstance smile on command. 

But when she does... she will grab your heart.  You will almost hear the hum of her inner sound track.
And I, have been her at home mother, nearly every single moment of her almost six years.  And tru enough... she has been a stubborn little pony, whom will figuratively kick you, if you mistake her quiet as an invite into her selectively private space.
I am beyond honored to have been her most important guest.  To have been gifted the position, of her shadow.  Her most trusted companion.  She has barely tolerated my pleas to keep her home from Kindergarten, with a bored expression and a monotoned promise to 'keep me in her heart' during the day, while I wait for her.

The summer moved by, so quickly.
The past 6 years, moved even faster.
In the blink of an eye, my glow worm has become a little lady, ready to enter the school world and create her own circle of friends and foster her new interests.  I am excited for her, to discover ideas and above all... to learn to read.  She can not wait to escape into the world of fantasy within books.

Little Tink:
I wish you so much luck, as a school kid.  Lots of friends, giggles and adventures.  Your little mind is so bright and eager to learn.  I will miss you, more than words can begin to describe.  Your spot on the couch will feel so empty, without your tiny pajama-ed bottom.  I can not imagine a full day without your small voice and sweet hugs.  It has been my privilege to share your mornings and snuggle your afternoons.
All my lobe,
Your heart broken Modder.

PS- Please try not to eye roll your embarrassing mommy too hard, while daddy has to pull my sobbing body from your classroom...

Thursday, August 16, 2012

Family Funday Mondays

As the summer nears an end and my mom panic sets in that I am losing my babies quickly... we clear our schedules each August for lots of family time. Specifically, Family Funday Mondays.
Our first Monday:
We took the children to Chicago to the Science and Industry Museum. (PS- not as awesome, organized or easy to navigate as the Field Museum.)

 (Coco in the Blow Machine.)
We then skipped over to the Lake for a little wading. (Coco was immediately drenched to her shoulders.)

Our Second Family Monday:
Included physical appointments for all children, errands, a family dinner and a long, happy walk. (PS- Coach despises walks.... we have two cars.)

(Tink's hand painted for the Wall of Fame... which means she's REALLY going to Kindergarten.... NOOO.)

It's possible, Coach was quoted directly as saying: "Don't get me wrong... I love our Family Funday Mondays... I just might love them more, if they'd last like 2 hours... rather than all day."

So he got the opposite of his wish,
when I planned 3 days in St. Louis....

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Mini Family Vacay

What I learned, on the road trip portion of our end of summer Mini Family Vacay....

1. We seriously need to Get with the Now and purchase iPhones.  You have no idea how often a Jimmy John's app or Mapquest, would prove convenient, until you are desperate.

2. No matter how many times you may politely ask Coach (pre-trip) if he knows where he is going and if he would like to print off directions... he likely wasn't really listening when he answered ".. I got this." Again... please reference 'What I learned... #1'.

3. Coach pees standing up...
obviously I knew this but the point was REALLY driven home, after regularly watching him choose the MOST DISGUSTING gas station eva, to stop for potty breaks.. even while commenting to himself: "Hey... look at that fancy Arby/BP combo station over there... that's pretty impressive" as his arms are turning the steering wheel over towards the station previously owned by the Texas Chainsaw Massacre family... Because, when you pee standing up.. what the F do you care what gas station you choose...

4. After an Olympic worthy balancing act hovering Coco over the toilet, while reminding her NOT TO TOUCH anything in the bathroom because it is so nasty (Please reference 'What I learned... #3') and then perfectly placing her in the middle of the stall, while you take 2 seconds to balance yourself... Coco will in fact, immediately pick up a strange piece of dirty toilet paper off the floor.

5. Tink's bladder is NASA strength.  She can 'hold it' for nearly 6-7 hours, while waiting for her 5 Star hotel potty or her home... which ever comes first.
(Again please reference 'What I learned... #3')

6. While stalled in traffic within 3 miles of your hotel (Please reference 'What I learned... #2')  The Kid may inform the van, "Did you know, if you stood the Titanic up, it would still be taller than the Arch." As a matter of fact, I most certainly DID NOT know that...

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Let's Hear it for The Gipper!

One is the loveliest Number that we'll ever know.

To our little Gippie:
The girl with the Number One bluest surprised eyes.
The girl with the Number One sweetest "Oooooohhhhhh"
The girl with the cutest little pointy tongue, which she will happily show off to anyone.
Happy First Birthday Gippie!
I promise to really try not to let Coach actually physically chew on your cheeks.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Aunts are Fun.

This text message exchange between Flag Girl and I, occurred during the evening following Gramma's Family Reunion.

Me: Remember earlier, when your Aunt asked you if I was your boyfriend?

Flag Girl: It's my new favorite memory...

Yes. That really happened.

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Let me Take a Quick Picture...

Last night, we went to an adorable little winery to listen to a seriously awesome band and yet we seemed to find nothing better to do, than take a thousand pictures of each other and then laugh hysterically over the fact that we JUST KEPT taking more pictures.
Good times, Clark... Good times.

Again... Coach and his sistas.  Soo pretty.

The Outlaws: not quite as pretty but still not bad.


The guys tried to take a dramatic shot but Coach couldn't stop laughing. 


Coach almost doesn't look completely uncomfortable and awkward with his wife.

Last question:
Did anyone notice the totally new and sorta drastic thing happening in these pictures?

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

It's not often...

in life, you are able to come across a woman, whom is such a beautifully engaging contradiction of herself, almost lyrical in her inspiration...

Dear Doc-
it is not often, someone will meet a woman, whom is:

- able to gracefully grow a perfectly amazing baby within her belly, with a full understanding of all Earthy mom vitamins... while simultaneously playing 3rd base like a hard-core bad motherwatchyomouff.

- able to mother those perfect babies with her happy sing-songy voice, fun mommy afternoons and loving light-up-the-room smiles... while secretly installing an intense and unwavering sense of fear and dread in the back of their little minds.

- capable of laying Down The Law on all of her siblings, making grown medical decisions for her mother AND grand-mother, telling countless family members EXACTLY what they should do, when they should do it... while also being the same Big Sista that randomly buys her lil broda new Redbird basketball shorts just cuz "he will look SO CUTE in them!"

- at the same time ultra-uber-awesomely competitive and driven to play her very best AT EVERYTHING in Life .... while weirdly able to cheer whole heartily and with much enthusiasm, everyone else around her, to also be the very best of themselves.

- secretly sorta the total boss of her house with the ability to remodel bathrooms and lay wood floors... yet treats her hubby like a King, gifting Clark man-nights and looking at him with 'I'm so in love with your Cuteness' eyes.

But mostly, it's so rare to meet a woman whom is just so: kind, infectious, cute, funny, sweet, scary, fiercely intelligent, humble, adorable, strong, busy yet always free for a phone call, friendly, intimidating and frankly Just One Cool Chick. Doc- You are the total package.
Happy Birthday sista-in-law. We love you.

**Additional Shout out to her AMAZING son, Glen Allen, for once again making (forcing) his Aunt cheer for those icky Purple Knights.  Doc really does have the very best kids.


**We interrupt this birthday blog day....

Exactly when did a majority of our nation begin participating, discussing and analyzing the political or religious views of owners from bad, greasy and tacky fast food restaurants?? And then take their bigoted and small-minded views, dramatically publicize those views on every major television network or news websites... stirring up the mixing pot of our country, to take to the streets or their Facebook accounts to support the ramblings of a fried chicken sandwich in the name of good Christian beliefs??
I honestly nearly laughed out loud (LOLed if you will...) at the shocking ridiculousness of this situation. Stop for a minute... sit quietly just for a second... and you can almost hear the dumbing down of our nation.
You certainly would NOT want to use your time to publicly support much less pressing issues such as the closing of our schools, child trafficking, drug addicted teenagers, the closing of our over-crowded prisons systems and under staffed mental/physical health facilities or the increasing numbers of teen suicide/pregnancy and domestic violence.
Instead, make sure you run out and buy a poorly made over-processed chemically pumped Chicken sandwich for $1.99 because it's moronic CEO blabbed his personal and idiotic opinions.
I'm sure the forward thinking actual Freedom to All founders and fighters of this country must be so proud. It's practically like the Marches organized for The Right for Women to Vote or Equal Civil Rights for all Races. Burn your bra and make sure you get fries with that.

** We will now proceed later in the day, with our scheduled birthday blogging.