Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Family Picture Day. Good Times.

A Few questions/Observations from:
Family Picture Day
(aka The Morning My Head Rotated in a Circle)

1. First. Why... is Family Picture Day, always the morning my Hair decides we have never met? Explain to me, if I ran to Dairy Queen on a Tuesday afternoon and bump into No One, my hair is a Pantene Advertisement. And yet, if I plan a Professional Picture, for 3 weeks... My hair will simultaneously be Dry yet Wet, Straight yet Frizzy, Puffy yet Flat and Curly on one side and mildly wavy on the other?
I could blame it on spending 48 solid minutes perfecting 4 tiny ponies.... Except my Hair has failed me at nearly every professional event, in my Lifetime. Yes, Sydney... Curly Hair is SO BLEEPIN Fun! I would love (dare) one person to walk up to me this week and exclaim, "You are SO lucky to have naturally curly hair! You NEVER have to get a perm!".
The same questions may be posed for:
Poor Outfit Selection.
Famously last second chin pimples.
And temporary hand paralysis leading to spontaneous inability to NOT shove eyeliner pencil directly into eye.

2. In 83% of the proofs, Coach's face appears to be physically pained by the entire experience. Obviously, Acting is not one of his Superflyawesome skills.

3. Please tell me, Why Tink hates to be pretty?
Literally, she screamed,
"I cant NEBER be Berry Pretty!"
Good luck to ya, Future Prom Date.

4. Coco has either perfected her 'Wink' ooorrrr, has one of those Notorious Lazy Picture Flash eyes. I'm gonna go with the 'Wink'. I would appreciate the rest of you, jumping on that bandwagon.

5. Can someone locate the Guinness world record, for the amount of times a mother has exclaimed in a very stern whisper... "Just Chill OUT and sit Still!" in the 20 minutes prior to the photographer arriving?

6. Last, I was thrilled to realize, The Kid's very expensive Glare Proof Glasses, are actually a NASA strength magnetic ray for every reflection or flash for a 2.3 mile radius.
Not that I mind, I secretly hoped to remember his 9th Birthday, as the month he shot Lasers from his eyes.

I have only viewed a small selection of the Proofs.
Despite their drama..
my children are the most beautiful group of Drama-filled Misfits, Eva. The unbiased public, will be the Judge, when and if I ever Print, label/stamp and mail my Christmas Cards.


Unknown said...

Yes, Tru Stories, you are notorious for bad pictures, NOT!

The Mrs. said...

You should have worn your hair Scary Spice style. That would have been money.