"Twenty Shades of ummm Orange"

My Official Book review on a little series, we'll call "Twenty Shades of ummm Orange or Something". 

Earlier this week, I finished the second and third book, within 48 hours. I'm not proud my reading has been kick-started into hyper speed by first the Hunger Game series and now the Twenty Shades series.... but what are you gonna do?
It was sorta awkward when The Kid continually KEPT over and over asking me "What's that book about??? It must be pretty good, you keep reading them!"

Let me start by making this clear:
These books are not for the faint of heart.
These books are not exactly ummmm... clean-ish (if you get my drift). I mean... it's blush worthy.
The writing is not superb, to say the least.
I nearly lost it over the 'Laters Baby' and repeated mention of 'chin nibbles along the beard line'
(no one really does that).
It's sorta like the Twilight series: Not exactly great reading, not written very well... several times I questioned why I continued reading page after page.  The books are TOO long and totally redundant.  The writer could have easily deleted 300 pages from the entire series and left enough for two actual good books. All of that said, I guess... I get it.
The books did get better, after the first.
I was totally offended often and eye rolled (YES Christian... I eye rolled!) many, many times. 
The chapters with the Rules???
You. Gotta. Be. Kidding. Me...
No way. No how.
The repeated emails??? Waste of paper.

Soooo... on the official scale of 1-5.
Great being a 5.
I would rate the books a 2.75ish.
Probably not gonna be my first selection for my new BlacKbird yoga sTudio Book Club.
That said, I read the second book in a matter of hours.
Not sure my children were even fed, during that time.

Still.... ummmm... if you want....
maybe you should read it.
For strictly research... I suppose.
I mean... it's not gonna hurt anything.
Unless, maybe you're Gramma.
Then please NEVER EVER read this series. 
Or at least, never discuss that you have.

Anyone else: Game on.
Just maybe hire a babysitter....