my tiny Tinkerbell of a daughter will start all day Kindergarten and It is BreaKing me... as you continue to read the following post, you'll assume Tink is my favorite. No child is my 'favorite' they are each mine for many different reasons. But my Tinkerbell... she's my girl, my soul mate, my teeny button of a companion. So little, I imagined I could curl her up and hold her in my pocket forever.
Except, apparently... I can not.
Once Tink entered the world, she was perfectly content to pass her days snuggled safely in the arms of her people. She was first nicknamed our glow worm, swaddled tightly in her pink 'bankies' so small, it was if I had purchased her from the toy aisle.
She was a quiet crier. Quiet sleeper. A quiet soft face, with quietly captivating blue eyes, I've described as the color of an approaching summer storm.
While her younger cousin Owl, crawled then walked then climbed everything first... Tink spoke first. Again.. quietly. Except immediately it was obvious Tink was funny. Amusing. Spunky. She was tiny... but she fought for her attention.
And then, she became our Tinkerbell.
Our teeny, blond haired, blue eyed Fairy.
With a quick wit and feisty temper.
Tink began to engage her crowds.
Not with flash (like her sista) but with a hook. Pulling you in and encouraging you to beg for her attention. Tink wanted her adults to earn her devotion, really buy a ticket to her show.
And once you had purchased that ticket, you may have noticed her self designed path is paved with her off colored stones. Tink has flair. Outfits with color, hats, mismatched choices, crazy curls and Wings... Any outfit, any costume, any holiday is made significantly more interesting with a pair of wings.
I am nervous for my Tink, in an organized school setting. She infamously ignores and dismisses all rules. While Tink rarely gets in trouble or crosses any real lines... she always prefers to follow her schedule, her inclination or her drummer before any other.
Tink chooses whom she wishes to speak too.
Tink chooses to dress, when and if she deems the day worthy of ditching her jammies. She will choose her version of a healthy diet, she will friend when ready and above all... Tink will let you know the exact moment her teeny legs feel ready to start her day and leave her couch. And not one minute sooner.
Tink is a walking expression.
Her attentive crowd is only a shoulder shrug, bumped hip or eye roll from losing her approval. She will not, under any circumstance smile on command.
But when she does... she will grab your heart. You will almost hear the hum of her inner sound track.
And I, have been her at home mother, nearly every single moment of her almost six years. And tru enough... she has been a stubborn little pony, whom will figuratively kick you, if you mistake her quiet as an invite into her selectively private space.
I am beyond honored to have been her most important guest. To have been gifted the position, of her shadow. Her most trusted companion. She has barely tolerated my pleas to keep her home from Kindergarten, with a bored expression and a monotoned promise to
'keep me in her heart' during the day, while I wait for her.
The summer moved by, so quickly.
The past 6 years, moved even faster.
In the blink of an eye, my glow worm has become a little lady, ready to enter the school world and create her own circle of friends and foster her new interests. I am excited for her, to discover ideas and above all... to learn to read. She can not wait to escape into the world of fantasy within books.
Little Tink:
I wish you so much luck, as a school kid. Lots of friends, giggles and adventures. Your little mind is so bright and eager to learn. I will miss you, more than words can begin to describe. Your spot on the couch will feel so empty, without your tiny pajama-ed bottom. I can not imagine a full day without your small voice and sweet hugs. It has been my privilege to share your mornings and snuggle your afternoons.
All my lobe,
Your heart broken Modder.
PS- Please try not to eye roll your embarrassing mommy too hard, while daddy has to pull my sobbing body from your classroom...
